Cover of Kim Has Developed an Allergy to Lilies (Finalist, Who Freaking Cares Writing Contest for Poetic Rejects)

    Kim Has Developed an Allergy to Lilies (Finalist, Who Freaking Cares Writing Contest for Poetic Rejects)

    I know this because she texted the group

    chat last night to say that anyone who was

    thinking of sending her a bouquet should

    make sure it doesn’t contain any lilies,

    particularly the stargazer variety.


    Was I supposed to send a bouquet?

    Are we a bouquet family now?


    Well, there goes the day lily

    arrangement I was apparently

    supposed to bring to Thanksgiving.

    Perhaps I could try goldenrod or

    ragweed instead?


    Also, how common is a lily allergy, really?

    What’s the current level of awareness?


    Not that Kim would make this up, of

    course, but wouldn’t it be far more

    dangerous to, say, offer her daughter

    a bouquet of pistachios or give

    Grandma a gluten arrangement?


    Come to think of it, isn’t Kim’s daughter

    named Lilly? Is that irony?

    Has anybody commented on this?


    I won’t say anything, of

    course. People don’t like

    irony that may irritate their

    eyes.


    Thank you for letting me know,

    I write instead. I’ll keep it in mind.